The Small Trust Tests

Purpose / Reason
✅ Start by trusting in small, low-stakes situations with new people.

How to Apply

1. Identify one person/situation safe for a small trust test.
2. Make a specific ask with a clear yes/no and time box.
3. Observe the response; note data for trustworthy vs. not.
4. Adjust your circle and boundaries based on the data.

How & Why It Works

• Small, bounded trust tests build accurate models of safety; attachment awareness shifts partner selection.

Results & Goals

• Immediate (0–72h): Fewer obsessive loops; sleep and appetite stabilize; first relief moments appear.
• Short‑term (1–4 weeks): Clearer boundaries and less contact checking; improved mood and energy; more social reconnection.
• Medium‑term (1–3 months): New relationship patterns (secure behaviors); sustained focus on goals; genuine hope and attraction alignment.

Citations / References

• APA — Relationships & Couples
• Gottman Institute — The Four Horsemen
• Greater Good Science Center — Attachment Styles
• EMDRIA — What is EMDR Therapy?
• ACBS — About Acceptance & Commitment Therapy (ACT)
• Linehan Institute — Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)
• APA — Coping with Grief